This is what a CMJ virgin looks like. He wears thick glasses. And has a recently grown beard–it’s slightly trimmed but mostly unkempt because he wants it to get quite bushy. (And yes, that is a bulldog puppy calendar over his shoulder. It’s adorable as hell. So shut the fuck up.)

It’s true: He has never before attended CMJ, despite the fact that he’s lived in New York City for several years now. He is somewhat excited but somewhat hesitant as well. Mostly, though, he just wants to see some bands he loves, discover some bands he’s never heard of and get this damn thing rolling. So please, dear reader, follow the CMJ virgin’s exploits throughout the week. Say hi if you see him out. He will be taking notes to share with you. After all, he loves you. And don’t you forget it.